Welcome to The Radius


Welcome to all who read these words,

Today, Friday the 13th, 2007, marks an especially significant day for a number of reasons. We welcome you to each reason, as we prepare your wig for the barrage of information and symbolism that is the Radius.

But nothing can prepare you for the sixth year of Morton's List. Six years ago in July, on Friday the 13th, 2001 Morton's List was unveiled. A game unlike any other, synthesized through a lengthy process of adventure research and countless interviews into all human activities, and the many causes of boredom.

This occasion kicks off with simultaneous events in many different locations, doing many different Quests. In diverse locations of Detroit, New York City, Other Cities, and HOQ#4 on the Internet a Quest will be rolled. Unified by the Inner Circle. All people. All Quests. All Friday the 13th.

And as always, a Friday the Thirteenth is always a powerful occasion, when the forces of Luck, Fate, and Karma are magnified and distorted by an influx of inter-universal energy. A new moon brings the cover of total darkness, and also speaks of new beginnings. This Friday the 13th.

The Center would like to extend additionally positive karma to Alexander, Loyal Henchman of the Twilight Lords. Origins 2007 in Columbus shall be forever in the memories of those who created the Quests of that epic weekend.

The End to Boredom is Neigh,

The Inner Circle is Limitless,

Karmic Order of the Twilight Lords
T.A.C.S.
Friday, July 13th, 2007

Karma Boost!

An Inner Circle Wedding
2007 by Twilight Lord Nathaninja

Join me, friends, in congratulating Inner Circle members and Empire of Nothing co-founders OverBill and Cricket on their upcoming wedding, happening this Sunday, July 15th at The Whitney in downtown Detroit!

If you have not had the pleasure of meeting these two highly motivated, positive and above all Karmic ninjas, play Morton's List long enough and you will. They are regulars at important events, and inspiring role models at home. Together with such notable figures as Trevor (who's known to pop up randomly any time something especially Karmic is going down), OverBill and Cricket hold down the Empire of Nothing, the premier Detroit area Inner Circle. Based in Ferndale, the city where Morton's List was first re-discovered in the mid-1990s, enough props cannot be given to the Empire of Nothing for their dedication and truly truly positive Karmic spirit.

It is my pleasure to extend an official congratulations from Center to this amazing couple, and invite you all to also send your wishes for a long, happy and Karmic future. During the Morton's List Birthday Party, wherever you are, raise a glass to OverBill and Cricket.

Click here to give the gift of Karma to OverBill and Cricket.

To submit your own Karma Boost, simply email Center. Let us know if you have a specific section of The Radius in mind, such as Stories, Karma Boost, Pic of the Month, etc.


SuperCulture
2007 by Twilight Lord Nathaninja

Inner Circle, this is important. It's always important, but this time more so. Because this time we're talking about the future of the Inner Circle, the Morton's List community, the Random Reality Revolution, mainstream culture, and all subcultures. We're talking about what it all means and how it all fits together. We're talking about taking it to the next level. We're talking about the emerging SuperCulture.

Let's take it back to grade school. This is the microcosm of culture, where we learn hard lessons - where a lot of the problems start. This is where cliques start, or at least become apparent and strengthened. Tribalism and fractionalization. Kids instinctually group together for strength in numbers. The In and Out crowds begin to form, with devastating if very different consequences on the psyches of members of both.

Without going into depth, it's easy to see how this happens. Not just in grade school, but any time every day. Say somebody is a dick to me. I have a choice. I can respond with the knee-jerk reaction and be a dick back. Just that easy I've established a me versus them situation. The other person opened up the possibility, but I sealed the deal. We each contributed equally to the situation. Expand this to the level of society and the full on us vs. them fallacy/tragedy is inevitable. You bomb us, we bomb you. And as long as both sides continue to hold onto this limited tribal mentality it will not end, unless one side is entirely obliterated. On any kind of mass scale this is hardly possible, let alone even 1% desirable.

This same process is at work, though much more subtly within a given culture/tribe. Let's bring it home and consider American society. The In and Out crowds of grade school grow up into the mainstream and various subcultures. Each holding onto old wounds and limiting their full expression.

The mainstream (conveniently considered to be one unified culture for our purposes), by rejecting the subcultures, robs itself of diversity. The unique flavor that subcultures offer is denied, leaving a bland, lowest common denominator. A voice that justifies its existence by how loudly it shouts. Its strength is unity, stability and the ability to bring people together through common experience. Yet this same strength is limited by the very fact that is refuses to acknowledge, validate, and embrace the subcultures it broke with.

The subcultures, by rejecting the mainstream, rob themselves of unity. The strength of shared experience and togetherness is denied, leaving them cut off and struggling against being defined by what they are not. Limited in potential to grow and share their important insights with all. Their strength is diversity, and depth of experience and flavor impossible to otherwise achieve and maintain. Yet they, too, will always run into the same wall, just the opposite side. They will be limited by their inability to overcome the divide.

As long as this us vs. them mentality prevails, as long as the two sides want the endless tug of war to continue, it will. But what happens when one side of a tug of war decides to let go? The rope falls, the other side goes flying, everybody laughs and goes off to eat and do something really fun together. The status quo is only viable so long as everyone plays along and acts how they've been accustomed to acting. Allow yourself to grow, evolve, and all of a sudden everything changes. Realize the part you're playing and that you are indeed playing a part, like an actor on a stage. Remember you're really the actor, not the role, and the play becomes something to play and have fun with, not take overly seriously.

Letting go can be hard. Subcultures are afraid to lose their identities - be swallowed up by the mainstream. Remember grunge? Disco? Rave culture? In the us vs. them flatland mentality, where all that exists is subculture and mainstream this fear is not unfounded. Start erasing the lines between a subculture and mainstream and the uniqueness and flavor of the subculture may dissolve like so much chocolate in milk.

On the flip side, mainstream has trouble accepting subcultures because it is too stuck on unity through conformity. People and ideas that look, feel, dress and operate differently don't fit in to the plan it can see. They don't reduce to the same lowest common denominator - they don't make sense. And as always what we don't understand we fear, and what we fear we reject and cannot unite with. Add to this a certain amount of apprehension. Subcultures may be out of line with common sense or want to dominate the mainstream. Nazis and Marxists were subcultures until they took over.

Nothing strengthens and keeps up barriers, makes and maintains our limits, like fear. Fear of losing identity, losing control. Is this beginning to sound like something else? Something that also has to do with temporarily going beyond your identity, giving up control to chance, fate, Karma? Hold that thought.

So how do we solve this dilemma? When you've got two forces, any two opposed forces, be they people, cultures, ideas, what have you, that are seeing things from opposite poles, a way to get beyond them is to draw it out as a simple diagram. Whatever your diagram looks like, this will help you conceptualize the problem. Here's the magic trick. The white space your diagram is drawn on is the key. This is the ground, the foundation that always unites whatever you've represented. The very paper represents the fundamental source of all things, and the possibility and opportunity to go beyond anything and everything. It's easy: draw a big circle around your diagram. You've just out contextualized the problem. You've just united the differences by making them all part of something greater. Now all you have to do is figure out what that something greater is, and you've got it.

Getting back to subcultures vs. mainstream, the circle we can draw around the endless battleground opens up a new space. It transcends and negates the tug of war, because it's the park where that struggle takes place in. It is the above culture, the over culture, the beyond culture, it is the SuperCulture. This SuperCulture removes the stakes from the struggle and exposes it for what it truly is: unnecessary. It is only drama, a play taken too seriously, tunnel vision brought on by fear.

The SuperCulture frees us all by erasing boundaries between mainstream and subcultures and between the subcultures themselves. And it does this without requiring that subcultures give in and be subsumed by the mainstream. It allows for differences, variation and uniqueness while at the same time providing unity - greater unity, true unity that the mainstream could never provide. Because as long as the mainstream denied the subcultures, it could never fulfill its true purpose. It could only be the largest piece of the pie, never unite the whole. Only the SuperCulture can do all this. It is more than the sum of its parts. Its emergent properties are found nowhere else.

Let's consider an example. Your body is made up of cells. Each cell is a totally complete life form, capable of reproducing itself. In the world of single cell organisms there is competition for food, fighting - all the basic drama of life just on a very simplified and super small scale. Over time some of these life forms realized that by cooperating, working together, specializing, etc. they could survive as parts of a multi-cellular organism. These super-organisms, e.g. your body, have properties and abilities far far beyond the cells that they are made up of. Yet these cells are still there, surviving, reproducing, as part of something greater. They have lost nothing by being part of you, but have been out contextualized. Their world no longer matters, so much so that it took human beings thousands of years to even discover they were made up of cells!

The SuperCulture is emerging. It is attempting to transcend and unite. What it will be and look like is not yet determined. All that matters now is how we get there. Remember that thought you were holding. Let's return to it.

If we know the goal (if not exactly what it will look like or be called) the question becomes how do we get there? What tools do we have that are capable of enacting this plan, of putting this theory into practice, of helping both sides take the next step? What can break down barriers, and help us see change as transcendence into something greater, not death? Random Reality.

Letting go of our roles, our conditioned reactions, our fears, our limitations, Random Reality allows us to overcome any stumbling block. It allows us to out contextualize any problem, escape from any Catch 22. And it can provide a path to transcending the social divide in the same way that it breaks down barriers within us. The power of Karma is limitless. The SuperCulture is coming and Random Reality is paving the way.


The Bookbinder
Your One-Stop Guide to All Things Custom in Morton's List
2007 by The Astonishing OddBall, 360° Rainbow Dragon/Yin of the Earth Adept

Click to view larger image

The Astonishing OddBall is a 360° Rainbow Dragon/Yin of the Earth Adept, also specializing in Morton's List. He hails from Oshkosh, WI where he lives with his girlfriend Sugar, a List of Life Adept specializing in Cosmic Law, his dog Boulder, and cat Karma. OddBall has been playing since 2002, and is co-founder of The Ninjas of the Crimson M, as well as The Sons of Pandora.


Pic of the Month

Each month The Radius showcases YOUR photos or artwork, whether taken or made for a Quest or inspired by Morton's List. One photo each month will be selected from among all the submissions for its exceptional flavor and Karma.

Image submissions are accepted via email and must be at least 400px wide, 72dpi, not larger than 3Mb, in RBG mode, and .jpg, .gif or .bmp format.

July 2007 Pic of the Month

TIP: To increase your chances of publication, please make sure to proofread and spell check before submitting. We edit all submissions for length and grammar, and are more likely to publish pieces that require less editing. Most written pieces should be 200-1000 words, with 500 being average. Photos or other images (using the format guidelines for Pic of the Month) that compliment your writing are encouraged and will increase your chances of acceptance. Submission instructions and the deadline for the next issue may be found here.

Lest people get the idea that all Inner Circle members almost got starring roles on Sex and the City, here is a good old fashioned nerdy Quest to enjoy.

An Exploratory Analysis of the Structural Influences and Distributional Patterns of Normative Aversion to Auto Saliva Ingestion
2007 by Greensword

Last night [June 28th], after much fun during the day, Orli, Russ, Keith, Cora and I sat down to play Morton's List. Now, for those of you who've never heard of this game, it's basically a list of hundreds of different things to do, and you roll a set of dice to randomly select your task for the evening. The trick to the game is that you can't back out, or switch to another task, unless it's physically impossible to complete the first one. The tasks are very varied - the last two times we played we got "relax" and "protest something".

This time, we rolled the task "Human Test Subject." The description for Human Test Subjects was, I swear to god, a paraphrase of the first page of my Div III. Essentially, we were told to conduct a psychological experiment. While everyone else was at a loss, I eagerly proposed an extension of the experiment I have been trying unofficially to conduct all year. Some of you may remember that time I made Nick, after much yelling and protesting by others, eat a spoonful of his own saliva. As a scientist, I felt compelled to find out - was Nick such an anomaly? Are people really that opposed to eating their own spit? Are certain types of people more or less likely to eat their own spit? Does having just eaten make them more or less likely to eat their own spit?

So, we stole some spoons from an ice cream store and walked up and down Northampton asking people to eat their own spit for us. (People frequently asked us where we went to school. When we said Hampshire, we got a lot of laughs and one, "You can get credit for anything there!")

Anyway, here are the results:

We approached 37 subjects, 15 males and 22 females, all in groups of two or more. 19 out of those 37 subjects (51%) ate their spit for us. Females (12 out of 22, 54%) were slightly more likely to than males (7 out of 15, 46%), a difference that was not significant (t = 1.69, p = .54). We also compared responses when we asked subjects who were standing outside of an ice cream store vs. walking on Main Street. Here we found that subjects who had probably just eaten (9 out of 20, 45%) were less likely to eat their own spit than those who had (10 out of 17, 59%), a difference that was also not significant (t = 2.03, p = .42). While these variables did not appear to influence outcome, we did notice that female subjects had a tendency to approach the challenge socially, with two groups (five women total) agreeing "If you'll do it, I'll do it." Another female asked the group of males she was with, "Should we all do it together?" to which she got no response.

Conclusion: We are dorks.

2007 Morton's List Tour de Chance

We've passed the half way mark of 2007, with many Tour Dates down and many still to go. By all reports they are getting more and more hype. Come to an event and become inspired to volunteer at the next one or even hold your own! It's amazing what you can do when you take a small first step and Karma helps you take the next.

Thanks to all those who have submitted or are working on events to become Tour de Chance dates. Together we can bring Morton's List to every gaming con, every community festival, and everywhere there are people waiting for the light and Karma of the Message of Morton.

The invitation to submit events for the Tour de Chance is still open. Here again is how it works.

There are four CLASSES of Morton's List events:

Each event will be one of the four Classes and up to one of the two Types. Here is a list of all possible combinations:

• KARMIC GATHERING TOURNAMENT


• KARMIC GATHERING CHAOTIC


• OFFICIAL TOURNAMNET


• OFFICIAL CHAOTIC


• SANCTIONED TOURNAMENT


• SANCTIONED CHAOTIC


• RANDOM TOURNAMENT


• RANDOM CHAOTIC

In preparation for the overhaul of MortonsList.com, all Tour de Chance events are listed on MySpace/mortons_list.

A quick word about volunteering. Center wants YOU to volunteer! Not because it makes our lives easier, though it helps. But because together we can accomplish so much more. It's amazing what a difference just one volunteer at an event can make. We do what we do for the love of Karma. It's all non-profit. So come work along side us, and help us spread Karma to those who have not been touched by Morton. If you live near Southern Illinois, Mid-Indiana, Northern Nevada, Southern Florida, or Mid-Alaska talk to us. This is your chance to up your game and make the crucial leap from entertained to entertainer. Email Center today.

And now for the updates:

SPOTLIGHT Spotlighted events are happing SOON. That means before the next issue of The Radius, where they will become part of the What Went Down section. So if you're going to attend or volunteer, NOW is the time to make it happen. You must make the choice. At this point, putting it off is the same as choosing no. Morton's List 6th Birthday Party Six years ago today Friday, July 13th, Morton's List was born unto the world. Now, six years and infinite Karma later we're celebrating with a Global Inner Circle party! Everyone everywhere, get together and roll the Boulder to add to the Karma. Organized parties are being thrown by Center NYC and Center Detroit, along with an Online Quest from The Horde and a Mini-Karmic Gathering: Family Reunion, being thrown by none other than distinguished Radius contributor, the Astonishing OddBall, Kryp, Horde master Ouija and other high level long time Inner Circle members! Spontaneous parties are popping up all over, including Columbus, OH, where the recent Karmalanches of ComFest and Origins have resulted in hundreds of new Inner Circle members. Wherever you are, and whether you can come to an established party or put on your own, come celebrate the game that has given us all so many good times. Eat some cake, roll some Boulder, and raise a glass to Morton's List! CONTACTS Center Detroit: nathaninja@gmail.com Center NYC: MortonsWeb@gmail.com HOQ #4: http://icp.meetup.com/753/calendar/5863501 Mini-Karmic Gathering: Family Reunion: the_astonishing_oddball@yahoo.com VENUES Detroit, MI: 6533 E Jefferson Ave Ste 603, Detroit, MI NYC: Union Square, Manhattan, New York, the Main Statue. Look for someone tall wearing sunglasses and a Morton's List bag. Oshkosh, WI: Menominee Park, Oshkosh, WI DATES Friday, July 13, 2007 TIMES Detroit: starting at 7pm EST, in effect and rolling by 9pm, going till late NYC: 7:30pm EST meeting, 8pm Quest HOQ #4: 8pm EST Mini-Karmic Gathering: Family Reunion: 1pm EST COST FREE The Gathering of the Juggalos 2007 LATEST WORD: Camp Karma: The Random Reality Realm will have the best possible location, close to all the action, with shade and all the benefits. Remember, to camp with us, talk to the people at Information Tent or find RamGog at the camp or wherever he is. As long as you're bringing 100% Karma and 0% drama you're welcome to camp with us. If you've never played Morton's List before, well the Gathering's one of the best places to join the Inner Circle! Bring food, flavor, games, ideas, creativity, lights, wood - whatever you have that will add to the Karma. We're gonna show everyone the true spirit of the Inner Circle! The time is now to get your tickets and email us for Morton's List presents: Camp Karma, the Random Reality Realm! That's right, the theme camp is fully in effect, being planned by Camp Karma Head Counselor, RamGog. The Twilight Lords have staked out a spot of prime real estate for the camp, and are working with RamGog to make it the best place to be at this year's Gathering. To join just contact RamGog below, or find him on site (or go to the Information Tent). All you need to bring is yourself and a tent, car, or whatever you plan to sleep in. If you have the resources to bring chairs, wood, food, drinks, banners, etc. to help raise the Karma of the camp, by all means go for it. You don't have to have ever played Morton's List before. All you need is a taste for adventure. Be ready and open for anything to happen, because it probably will! When you arrive, check with the Information Tent to find out where Camp Karma is and come set up your tent right away. The bigger and fresher we can make the camp the more Karma we will channel. Email RamGog to join Camp Karma at the Gathering of the Juggalos 2007! CONTACTS www.JuggaloGathering.com VENUE Hatchet Landings, Cave-in-Rock, Illinois DATES August 9-12, Thursday through Sunday TIMES Midnight each night come to Camp Karma for the legendary and epic Morton's List Midnight events. Through the day and night, visit Camp Karma for camp-sponsored events and demos. COST $150, which includes FREE tent camping! There is no additional fee to play in any or all of the Morton's List events! GenCon 2007 LATEST WORD: Don't Panic. Yes, all the Morton's List events on GenCon.com/2007/indy read "cancelled." This is a regrettable temporary problem that Center is working hard and fast to resolve. Basically, GenCon cancelled the events, thinking Morton's List was not compatible with their family friendly event. However they were very open to discussion, and Center has already brokered a deal to hold all the events as planned. It's only a matter of time before the events are put back up. For all the MANY people who already purchased event slots for Morton's List and/or the 990th Ninja Clan Showdown at GenCon: Please make sure you either still have them or if refunded, re-buy them. We apologize for the inconvenience, and will make it up to you by giving you the best Random Reality experience ever. Worst case scenario, just show up at the appropriate times and call 248-672-3890 to get in on the Quest. The triumphant return of Morton's List to GenCon is on! For the first time EVER, you can officially enjoy Morton's List at the nation's largest gaming convention. Center is holding 12 two-hour Quests and the 990th Ninja Clan Showdown. As with most larger conventions, if you sign up to run events as a volunteer you get in free and may even qualify for a free hotel room if you run enough events. Come witness the epic return of Morton's List to GenCon! It's going to be a party, with many old old school Listers from back in the mid-'90s days flying in from all over the country to enjoy the flavor. Come hang out and Quest with us. Email Center to volunteer at GenCon Indy 2007! CONTACTS OFFICIAL Morton's List at GenCon Indy page www.GenCon.com/2007/indy CustomerService@gencon.com VENUE Indiana Convention Center, 100 South Capitol Ave, Indianapolis, Indiana 46225 Tel: 317-262-3400 DATES Thursday, Friday, Saturday & Sunday, August 16 - 19, 2007 TIMES (all events except the Showdown are Quests - the titles are simply to help explain the game) THURSDAY 8:00 PM - Morton's List: The End to Boredom 10:00 PM - Morton's List: Like playing Truth or Dare - without the truth! FRIDAY 12:00 PM - Morton's List: The Game of All Games 2:00 PM - Morton's List: 30 Sides of Fun 4:00 PM - Morton's List: The End to Boredom 6:00 PM - Morton's List: Overcoming your Fears! 8:00 PM - Morton's List: The Game of Real Life Adventure! 10:00 PM - Morton's List: Friday Night Chaos SATURDAY 12:00 PM - Morton's List: A deep spiritual path similar to Zen or Discordianism! 2:00 PM - Morton's List: Many things to many people 4:00 PM - Morton's List: It will school you 6:00 PM - Morton's List: A Random Reality lifestyle 8:00 PM - Morton's List: Secret societies and Karmic ceremonies 10:00 PM - 990th Ninja Clan Showdown - hosted by Morton's List SUNDAY 12:00 PM - Morton's List: The End to Boredom 2:00 PM - Morton's List: The End to Boredom COST Pre-registration (Sunday, February 11th, 3pm EST to Monday, July 9, 2007 3pm): 4-Day badge: $65 1-Day badge: $35 Onsite: 4-Day badge: $75 1-Day badge: $45 NOTE: Just show up. Once you arrive all other concerns will be addressed - do not trouble yourself with such details. Karma will take care of everything. There is no additional fee to play in any or all of the Morton's List events!

UPDATES

Burning Man 2007

LATEST WORD: We're officially up and listed!
Random Reality Camp
Random Reality Camp is a real life game where strangers become friends, boredom becomes adventure and chance becomes synchronicity. Experiences may include meeting people, artistic projects, exercise & sports, learning something new, or missions to find something or someone. Limitless possibilities!
Hometown: Detroit, MI
Contact: nathaninja (at) gmail (dot) com

The Morton's List Random Reality Theme Camp is on! We are on the 4:30 axis street, near the CouchSurfing Camp, so you know the random flavor will be epic! We have 50' x 50' - plenty of room for you to come camp with us.

The Karmic Order of Twilight Lords knows of nothing short of non-dual realization that has the potential of profound consciousness expansion of a combined Burning Man Morton's List experience. Either go or don't go, but know that if you go you will never be the same. Our crew is growing each month - take this chance to experience Burning Man the best possible way - with a theme camp of Karmic friends.

Email Center to Join the Morton's List Random Reality Theme Camp at Burning Man 2007!

CONTACTS
OFFICIAL Morton's List Random Reality Theme Camp at Burning Man page
www.BurningMan.com
Burning Man Tickets
Burning Man Online Community

VENUE
Black Rock City (on the "playa" in the Black Rock Desert several hours north of Reno, NV)

DATES
Monday, August 27 - Monday, September 3, 2007, Random Reality Camp will be up and running as of Wednesday, August 29th

TIMES
Non-stop

COST
10,000 tickets: $250 (mail order only - cashiers check or money order) also available on the Internet
Unlimited tickets: $280 (online, mail order, walk-in, available through 08/24/07)

There is no additional fee to play in any or all of the Morton's List events!


The Karmic Gathering: ¡Devastacion!

LATEST WORD: Hype is building for the Zombie Walk! RamGog is promoting the hell out of the event, and without a doubt it will be the biggest hypest Karmic Gathering of all time.

What could possibly make this Karmic Gathering better? Zombies!!! Zombies are like gravy - they make everything better. Thursday the 13th we are sponsoring a free Zombie Walk and Karmic Gathering pre-party, so rip up some old clothes, throw on some gray make-up and come walk with the dead!

A Karmic Gathering, for those of you yet to attend one, is like the life-size version of the ceremony the Table Master performs before rolling the Boulder. They both summon and focus the Karma of the group. A Karmic Gathering before a Quest focuses on that hour period. Karmic Gathering events focus your Karma for months - until the next one. It is also a big get-together where people play Morton's List, attend seminars, make new friends, and revel in the highly Karmic spirit created only at this special time and place.

The Karmic Gathering: ¡Devastacion! is rapidly expanding into the largest most promoted Morton's List event ever. We are actively cross-contaminating other subcultures, such as Zombies, Burners and CouchSurfers to assemble a Karmic mass unlike anything to date imagined. RamGog is taking it to the streets and cons with rave style club flyers, spreading the Word of Morton like a country preacher who Caught the Karma!

Get your tickets now. What better excuse to escape the winter doldrums than to ride the KarmaCane down to sunny Miami, and party it up with the Inner Circle and the Twilight Lords at Center.

Email RamGog to volunteer at The Karmic Gathering: ¡Devastacion!

CONTACTS
www.KarmicGathering.com

VENUE
Spring Hills Suites Marriott, 6700 NW 7th St, Miami, FL

DATES
Thursday - Saturday, December 13th-15th, 2007

TIMES
Thursday - Zombie Walk and pre-party
Friday & Saturday - noon to midnight plus The Thirteenth Hour afterparties

COST
$30 for the entire weekend, including food and events
Hotel and amusement park entertainment extra


More Events

With so many Morton's List Tour de Chance dates make sure not to overlook the many non-Tour events hosted by Inner Circle members all over.

LATEST WORD: Big Cheddar is finalizing plans and working with Center to get tickets up for sale shortly. It's pretty far in the future, but this is a MUST DO event if there ever was one. People will be talking about it for the rest of their lives. Do not miss out. Some ninjas are even making plans to stay a few more days to witness and celebrate the summer solstice!

This Karmic Gathering will be so legendary we had to give people more than one full year to prepare for it. So while not part of the 2007 Morton's List Tour de Chance, it is a keystone event of 2008. It marks the first truly destination driven Karmic Gathering.

Not only is The Karmic Gathering: AlasKarma hosted by one of the coolest ninjas ever to seek Morton, none other than that disgruntled goat, Big Cheddar, but it will take place outdoors in Alaska, within a week of the summer solstice - the perfect time to enjoy the warm weather (60s-80s). Words can barely begin to describe this unprecedented event, but we'll try.

It will include three days of Morton’s List under the midnight sun, Karmic trips to nearby natural wonders, and be the first outdoor Karmic Gathering. So get ready to camp in one of the world's most breathtaking settings. This is your chance to fulfill a life goal and do it with friends, with the Inner Circle.

Tickets and more information will be available soon! Start your planning today. Flying to Anchorage, Alaska is easier and cheaper than you think. The official travel agent will help you plan and make the journey as cheaply as possible through group bookings and discounts.

Prepare to Pioneer a Once in a Lifetime Experience.

Prepare to Journey to the Frontier of Random Reality.

Prepare to Be There.

Email us to volunteer at The Karmic Gathering: AlasKarma

CONTACTS
www.KarmicGathering.com

VENUE
A private ranch outside of Wasilla, Alaska. You will be shuttled there from the Anchorage airport.

DATES
The weekend of Friday, June 13th, 2008

TIMES
Noon to Midnight each day, plus The Thirteenth Hour after parties

COST
Only $123 for $45 entry ($15/day), nine Karmic meals (Thursday dinner through Sunday dinner) and shuttle transport to and from the Anchorage airport

What Went Down:
Whether you made it or missed it, the "What Went Down" report follows up on each event covered by The Radius.

Florida SuperCon

Florida SuperCon was the first major event that The Karmic Gathering: ¡Devastacion! host RamGog attended to spread word of the coming Karmapocalypse and recruit Inner Circle members. Perhaps the Karma was too strong! We hope to have a report for you next issue.

ComFest was the first experimental event held at a community festival attended by the general public. Though leaning toward the liberal anti-authority hippie side, the event did not cater to a specific subculture such as gaming. Here is what went down in the words of Twilight Lord Nathaninja:

ComFest proves that Columbus, OH is a Karmic nexus. Strange, but true. Once you get over the bad Karma of being the largest city on the planet named after Christopher Columbus, it's really a great place. You can't argue with a city where it's legal for women to go topless 24/7!

I arrived Thursday night, met up with The Loyal Henchman of the Twilight Lords, AKA the Godfather of Random Reality in Columbus, and from then until leaving Sunday afternoon it was on! We shared a booth with a local anarchist group, which worked out very well, and handed out Random Reality propaganda pamphlets and six-sided dice needed to play the simple game they contained to passers by. We enticed many into joining a game of Morton's List that was beginning "right now!" We also met tons of cool ninjas, including many Juggalos and gamers, some of whom would come back in two weeks to help out with Origins.

The many many Quests we rolled included making a custom slang dictionary using Renaissance level technology (so memorizing it versus writing anything down), playing Hunted Hunter and Attacker Defender, playing make me laugh, and much much more. On top of all the fun during the day there were shows, parties, bars and clubs at night. If you haven't heard of Anna and the Annadroids, you need to come next year. Think hot female robot mime dance routine.

After it was all said and done, we had a blast and learned a lot. We will be back and bigger than ever before next year, with a full Morton's List booth, weekend long scavenger hunts, and the Ninja Preacher has promised to make appearances! Columbus is quickly becoming the capital of Random Reality in the U.S.


Origins International Games Expo 2007

Origins is one of the largest gaming conventions in the U.S., but just as important, it is the premier event of the Game Manufacturer's Association (GAMA). It is where all the new games premier and they hold an Academy Awards style contest for best game, etc. Even more important than all that is the fact that it's super fun. It's large but not overwhelming. It's a big adventure gaming industry event but it's not stuffy or corporate. And most importantly Origins loves Morton's List! Here's what happened at this year's record breaking and truly EPIC Origins in the words of The Loyal Henchman of the Twilight Lords:

Karma be with you.

WEDNESDAY
Decided to check things out early. Showed up around 8:30-ish to see what all was going down. I get two badges and play an impromptu game of ML with three random passers by. We end up inventing our own board game out the items in our pocket. Overall, Wednesday was very positive. In the short time I was there I got a lot of "Oh, you do Morton's List!? Cool. Where have you been?" and the like.

THURSDAY
Epic. Thursday was epic. Too excited to sleep in, I get up at the crack of dawn and go purchase breakfast for the volunteers working behind the registration booths. I show up with three packs of thirteen bagels (and cream cheese) from Panera Bread at 7:00 am. I tell the volunteers / convention people, "This breakfast is brought to you by Dark Carnival Games." They were very happy to have food and for the rest of that day I was "that cool guy who brought us breakfast" in the eyes of the staff.

I met up with the Looney Labs folks who were very chill and very cool. We're all about peaceful co-existence and getting along with others at the convention.

Trevor and Trillion [a down-ass ninjette met at ComFest] are supposed to show up around 12. Trillion shows up and the room decorating begins. I decided to hang the clan banners in the room to raise hype for the Ninja Clan Showdown.

I have Trillion (and later on Trevor) create a sign in color & duct tape it on the floor of the convention center reading,"Morton's List" with arrows pointing to the escalators so that everyone who walks by this area will see we're here. We duct tape up the words "Morton's List" on the wall opposite of the Ninja Clan signs.

Trillion, Trevor, myself and a guy named Nathan from Looney Labs make signs for us. They say, "The end of boredom is nigh," "Morton's List," "Camp Karma" and another one with a bug stylized "M" that Trevor made. We put up an M on the back wall made of glow in the dark stars.

The Ninja Preacher makes an appearance proclaiming "THE END OF BOREDOM IS NIGH" and "MORTON'S LIST IS THE END OF BOREDOM" and "DOWN WITH BOREDOM!" It turned a lot of heads.

The eight o'clock Quest had about 13 people. A tremendous showing. Many of them had heard me hyping up the game while others had wandered in to see what the game was about. The group rolled Skate or Die. Instead of determining this to be impossible, we decided to invent our own skating game. The book mentions to watch out for Steamrollers, cars and crazy squirrels. So, I toss out to the group "Who wants to be a skater? Who wants to be a car? Who wants to be a steamroller? Who wants to be a crazy squirrel?" Thus we invented a semi-turned based game that we played on the convention center floor. Squirrels attacking steam rollers (the driver isn't enclosed), steam rollers running over cars, cars running over skaters and skaters chasing away squirrels. It was great fun. There was an older couple who played... maybe in their 40's or 50's who DOMINATED as a pair of steamrollers.

The game ended early so we decided to roll another quest (a sign folks were enjoying themselves). We roll Human Test Subject and were joined by some of the members of Looney Labs. We go downstairs back to the convention hall and experiment to see what happens when one person gets more than they bargained for. One girl holds up a sign that says "Free hugs." When people come up to hug her, the rest of the group (now about 15 or so!) all come up and try to hug the person. It was pretty funny watching people's reaction and everyone had a good time.

At one point there were about 24 ninjas playing. We roll the Quest that has us playing billiards. Unable to find a pool table we decide we have enough people to play Human Billiards. 16 people were the pool balls. Six people were pockets with a couple left over to watch / laugh. We set up on the convention center floor and ask, "Who wants to play pool!?"

An older guy with a son who couldn't have been more than eight decide they want to play. The kid totally made the game that much more awesome. He pushed the Q ball around into the other balls who knocked into pockets. His dad helped him a lot and the players were kinda on his side. He won in the end and everyone cheered his name. The kid just beamed. Very fun game.

We come upstairs and people are chanting... CHANTING... "Morton's List! Morton's List!".

We play another game. After some lengthy rolling we get Diverse Pathways. THE Diverse Pathways. At Origins. We divide the huge group into four groups and send them out into the convention.

One group is from Utah and needs a ride home. Tonight. They ask people for rides (they had some trouble coming up with a theme). One group is from Europe and their tour bus stopped here by mistake. They were having a great time of it. One group... pretended to be... well, damn. I can't remember, but it was pretty cool. One group were spies from Russia and they were HILARIOUS. They all had the Borat accent and were walking around like a pack of confused bumbling spies. "You take package. I take message. We meet in atrium at midnight for vodka, da?" At the end while we were waiting for people to come back, they stayed in character and one of them gave the others English lessons. Funny stuff.

The Quest ended with more chanting and cheering. Everyone had a blast.

SATURDAY
Saturday leading into the Ninja Clan Showdown was fairly chill. I developed a following of a few groups of ninjas who really got into Morton's List. Trevor and I also had help from Trillion and a chick named Cass.

The 12 o'clock Quest was Conduct a Survey. It looked like a fun Quest until Chris (aka "Morton" from the epic rock star quest of 2002) [aka Goblin Grotto] showed up... in a chicken costume. The Inner Circle became a news crew as Chris interviewed Origins attendees in his chicken suit. Hilarious.

The 2 o'clock Quest. We rolled that we had to solve a puzzle. We went to Looney Labs and played a brief puzzle, but moved on to search for others. Neither the dealer's room nor the board game room had puzzles so we decided to solve mind puzzles. After a few riddles I stumped the Inner Circle with the knife / fork / spoon number routine.

The 4 o'clock Quest. This quest didn't go so well. We rolled that we had to enjoy music. We proceeded to Java's to listen to some YouTube stuff, but YouTube wasn't downloading so well. With teens mixed with 30-somethings the music we played for one another... well, it just didn't work. The best part about the Quest was everyone playing understood that stuff like this happens and that we gave it a good try.

The 6 o'clock Quest. We rolled banquet amongst an Inner Circle hard strapped for cash. We took a figurative interpretation of the Quest and decided to collect a quotes banquet... a banquet of the mind. We went around the convention and collected silly quotes and laughed about them.

The 8 o'clock Quest. With gallery hop in full swing we rolled that we needed to make money. The inner circle took to the streets of Columbus (careful not to stand in front of any business) and began to sing horribly on purpose. We had a sign out in front of us reading "Will stop singing for $$$. All proceeds to benefit Camp Fire Girls." We managed to sound hilarious and get some strained looks from gallery hoppers. We made about 5 bucks.

SUNDAY
Sunday began after the Ninja Clan Showdown. At 1:00am, Trevor, Cass, Chris and I went to a room party to play a drinking game called Cult with the Party Hard Corps group. It was a fun time. I left early. Cass got partially naked. Trevor got drunk... which was highly amusing.

Trevor and Cass didn't sleep that night, but still iron manned it to help out with Quests Sunday.

At 12:00 we rolled another Intellectual Duel and did a round robin on such important topics as Samurai versus Cowboys and Gimli from LoTR versus myself. We rolled a second Quest (we had plenty of time) and created a three-dimensional sculpture with random things found around the convention hall... including people. The Jonin of clan Strong Favorite was the Table Master and won the debate.

At 2:00 we rolled Conduct a Survey. Each member of the Inner Circle wrote down a question that the others couldn't see, creating an incredibly random set of questions which we asked to passers by. We went over to another game called RPG which larps the fighting system of the Final Fantasy video games and were called in to be zombies during a match.

I heard there was talk of a group of Pirates attempting to mess up the Ninja Clan Showdown from Trey, but I never saw them. What could they have done in the face of 56 ninjas along with the Loyal Henchman to the Twilight Lords?

Other random Quests throughout the weekend included:
Scientific Experiment. The Inner Circle created a maze to run miniatures through to see if the mini's were intelligent. The maze was made out of con materials.

The Cryptic List was attained! A Deviation caused the 18 strong Inner Circle to hybridize two Quests. We had Ultimate Light (number 29 on Yang of the Sky) with Ancient Wisdom (on Vision Quest, where the Inner Circle talks to folks at least 30 years older). The Inner Circle split into two groups to do awesome things for an older person and to get wisdom from them. Both groups helped out different security members and heard stories of lives saved, youthful highjinks and other tales. The Inner Circle walked away with a feeling that they'd done if not a great thing, a really good thing by being good listeners and performing other services.

Derelicts of Dialogue. Instead of finding creepy homeless people to talk to we decided WE were the odd people. We went and talked to the very normal non-origins people as though being normal and not playing games was the really oddball thing we wanted to learn about. It was highly amusing to talk to the football jocks. "What do you do for fun?" "Football" "Oh, you mean like Bloodbowl?"

Morton is Within

Japan: Ninja Homeland

Twilight Lords Nathaninja and R. Jesse safely returned from the land of the Rising Sun this past Sunday, after completing the most important Morton's List research expedition to date. A truly Karmic convergence of epic proportions occurred, leaving it's mark not only on this trip, but Origins as well. Although much of what transpired during this legendary voyage must go untold (as they say, what happens in Japan stays in Japan), the following is an account of some interesting and Karmic highlights, by Twilight Lord Nathaninja:

Twilight Lord R. Jesse and myself were accompanied on this momentous expedition by three high level American Ninjas and long time Morton's List associates, forming the necessary crew of five: each representing one of the five Japanese elements - Earth, Water, Fire, Wind (R. Jesse) and Void (myself). Our first day was Monday, which we spent exploring a temple complex north of Tokyo. We followed up our serious work with a visit to Tokyo's ninja themed restaurant. Although we take ninja and ninpo very seriously, it's important to be able to laugh at oneself and enjoy the stereotypes, as the Japanese themselves obviously do.

Our meeting with the Koka Ninja Clan was not until Thursday, so we took Tuesday to become more familiar with Japanese culture through museums and pop culture. Panties in vending machines, square watermelons, highly controversial anime and manga, video games you've never even imagine - it's all there and more. Our wigs were given a strenuous workout as were our feet after going strong for 21 hours. We ended the day (night) in a traditional bath house. Unfortunately it forbade yakuza.

The following day we traveled to Kyoto, the staging point for our meeting, as the Koka and Iga ninja hail from the nearby hills. On the way we paid our respects at Hiroshima. That is an experience beyond words. The raw absolute stark horror gives new meaning to the term ground zero.

Sobered up from the lights and distractions of Tokyo, we spent the night preparing on all levels for our meeting the following day. One never truly knows what to expect when dealing with ninja. It was to be truly a day never to forget.

Of course, we must gloss over these details to protect the identities and honor of those involved. Suffice it to say that a legendary level of Karma was attained - truly a critical success. It was not without its trial and our skills were put to the test, but in the end, we received what we came for and so much more. Morton's List and Random Reality have come full circle and an epic Quest has been completed. A new world has unfolded and we along with all Inner Circle members stand poised to enter this realm hitherto undreamed of.

We are still coming off this incredible Karmic high, which has undoubtedly altered our very DNA as its effects are irreversible. The remaining two days of the trip were an excited blur of temples, dig sites, more big city lights and increasing clarity. Like when you're finishing a puzzle and have all but a small section to go - that sped up feeling of placing piece after piece in rapid succession.

This summary just scratches the surface. As ever, Morton's List resulted in many random Quests, including hunting elusive Geisha, dressing in color coded shirts and wrestling masks and sneaking into a match, fending off giant monkeys after midnight, and being schooled by the legendary samurai castle, Himeji-jo. These and many more (mis)adventures added to the unbelievable Karma. On a scale of 1 to 15, 15 being the Japanese number for perfection, this expedition was a 14, the truly perfect number, for pure perfection once attained, leaves no reason to exist.